Setting the Scene

by Lori

Making love with your spouse should be a delightful time of intimacy and pleasure. Here are some things to consider in making your private time more comfortable and enjoyable.


  • Get a lock for your bedroom door or choose places where you will be alone with no chance of people wandering in.
  • Consider the noise factor. Insulation in walls, sound-absorbing fabrics (carpets, drapes, etc.), cover music, or taking the farthest bedroom in the house can help keep your sexuality private.
  • It’s also a good idea to get a locking box or drawer for bedroom items like birth control, lubricant, sex manuals, etc. (especially if you have nosy kids).

This article contains affiliate links. If you click and buy, we make a commission. Thank you for supporting TMB with your purchases.


  • A comfortable bed is a good piece of furniture to invest in. Not only will it make lovemaking more comfortable, but it will also help you get a good night’s sleep.
  • Get some soft pillows for tucking here and there.
  • Consider the temperature of the room. I’m sure many of you can identify with the temperature issue. Work to find a balance between goosebumps and heat stroke. (Note to men from Paul – being too hot will not keep you from enjoying sex the way being too cold will for her!)


  • Make your bedroom a neat and attractive getaway place just for the two of you.
  • Buy a dimmer switch and install it on your bedside lamp for playing with light levels.
  • Try different-colored light bulbs (soft pink is nice).
  • Candles are a romantic lighting option (be sure and put them where they can’t be knocked over or get the LED kind).


  • If you like music, pick something you feel will enhance your lovemaking time and put it on repeat at a comfortable volume (most people prefer instrumental music, as words can be distracting).
  • There are also non-music soundtracks available (waterfalls, crickets, that sort of thing).
  • Use a white noise machine to block outside noise and to cover bedroom noise.


  • Be sure to bathe often enough to be pleasing to your spouse (deodorant is an optional preference).
  • Perfumes and scented powders are nice (don’t use too much). As an alternative, you could scent your sheets lightly instead.
  • Consider air fresheners, scented candles, and scented wax warmers.


  • Be sure to clip and file nails (both fingers and toes!).
  • Use lotion for soft skin.
  • Have soft clean sheets.
  • Store lubricants and massage lotion nearby.


  • Brush your teeth (floss and mouthwash optional).
  • Some folks like flavored items in the bedroom (food, flavored lotions and powders).


  • Have some small towels or wipes handy for cleanup.
  • Make sure that lighting and sound can be turned off from the bed.
Related Reading:
Lubricants - for ease, comfort, and play.

Return to Healthy Sex Section     Return to Home

Image credits
bedroom Maya Kruchancova | Adobe Stock
candle © Gerd Altmann / Pixabay