Climax Survey

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How do you climax?

182 women and 419 men have answered
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  • All the men and 96% of the women have had an orgasm in the last six months.


  • Data was calculated from what percentage of orgasms were reported from each source. We did not force respondents to total 100%. Men totalled 113%, women 150%.
  • Intercourse, with or without added stimulation, resulted in 60% of men’s orgasms, but only 43% of women’s.
  • Manual sex, by spouse’s hands or with a toy, accounted for a third of female orgasms, but only 11% of male climaxes.
  • Solo masturbation was the second biggest source for men’s orgasm, at 25%. Women were close with 21% of their orgasms being from solo masturbation.
  • Oral sex was responsible for 21% of female orgasms, but only 6% of male orgasms.


  • The left side is the percentage of an individual’s orgasm that come from intercourse.
  • Twenty-two percent of women did not orgasm from intercourse, and 14% did so for only 10% of their climaxes.
  • Eight percent of men and ten percent of women only climaxed during intercourse in the last six months.


  • Sixty-one percent of women and 70% of men engaged in solo masturbation during the last six months.
  • For 3% of men and 7% of women solo masturbation was the only source of orgasm.
  • Solo masturbation was responsible for at least half of orgasms for 20% of women and 22% of men.
  • For women masturbation was more common for each older age group from under 25 to 45-54. Over 55 was lower than for those 45-54, but higher than all other age groups.
  • For men solo masturbation decreases with age. All men under 25 masturbated, 74% of those 25-34 did so, 75% of those 35-44, 68% of those 45-54, and 53% of those 55 and older.


  • Six to ten orgasms a month was the most common answer, chosen by 28% of men and 30% of women.
  • Six percent of men and 11% of women climax more than 30 times a month. For women some of this is due to multiple orgasms.
  • Seventeen percent of men and 24% of women climax less than six times a month.
  • Women age 45-54 have the most orgasms, followed by those 35-44. Younger women are not even close.
  • One third of 25-34 climaxed at least 21 times a month. This dropped to 16% of those 35-44, 15% of those 45-54, and 9% of those over 55.


  • Men are more likely to climax than women. Ninety one percent of men climax at least 9 time in ten, while only 56% of women do so as often.
  • Twenty-one percent of women and 7% of men climax no more than half the time.
  • Women age 45-54 were most likely to orgasm at least 80% of the time (78%), followed by those 55 and over (75%). Those 35-44 were third at 73%. Only 56% of those under 35 years of age climaxed at least 80% of the time.
  • For men this was steady until age 55 and over when climax every time dropped from 71% to 57%.

Women’s Comments:

  • A lot both on top or other positions.
  • My husband makes sure all is well with me before he even considers himself. It’s been a long journey, but we have found the true meaning of God’s love and it changed our lives totally!
  • My husband has low libido. I have had to masturbate for my sexual release more often than I would like. Married 27 years, I’m 52 and he’s 56. I have always enjoyed making love. He can go for months, until he notices I am suffering. Of course I feel rejection. After years of going for 3 to 4 months between making love, I started really committing to masturbating and being able to climax. I have tried for years but, never able to climax. Now, it’s made it harder to orgasm with him in me. I also don’t ever feel he wants and needs me like I deeply want and need him. I feel like he is doing me a favor or performing an obligation. He doesn’t say that of course, but I always am the one who brings it up. It’s been almost 6 weeks right now since we made love together. I have masturbation. And he has been there with me once or twice during that time to help me with a toy and his hands. I know while he’s doing it is just for me. Even when I have an orgasm it’s not the same as making love to each other, becoming one is. It’s not the same as when you’re both so hot for each other and you know you’re making your partner feel so good and they want you so much. I feel guilty afterwards many times. I feel like at the moment, it feels so good and closer to him. Then he’s a sleep snoring and I start thinking he didn’t even attempt to want to take it to the next level( wanting to have intercourse) , and since it’s so long between events, I get so excited and then while he’s helping me with a toy or his fingers, I start thinking I have to finish, I know I’m taking too long. This is just for me to start with. I just can’t understand how you would come to a place where you didn’t want to make love to each other. He is very nice and kind in other ways. I woke up today like many days feeling like making love, I snuggled back into him and he rubbed my legs. But that was it, he wanted to go to breakfast. I felt terrible most of the day. When I get excited and it doesn’t go anywhere, I feel crapy and usually get a headache. He never noticed all day. Tonight we came to bed and he was watching the news. I brought my toy with lube and a towel to bed. He ended up getting up and going in the bathroom after I started using my toy. He sat in there in the dark. Well that made me feel strange and I couldn’t finish. Did he not want me to do use it or what. I wasn’t able to finish for thinking about him sitting in the dark. In the next room. We have talked about this so much, but no changes.
  • My husband refuses to give me manual or oral sex and I almost never orgasm from intercourse alone, so unless I self-stimulate during intercourse and beat him to an orgasm, I don’t get one unless I solo masturbate. I don’t like it, but he drew a line and that’s that. So, that’s why I put 30% intercourse, 60% solo, and 10% in my sleep. I do have dreams of him desiring and pleasuring me.
  • In the past 6 months, I did solo masturbate one time… But other than that it’s always with the hubby! And he does everything he can to ensure I have multiple orgasms– that way on the rare occasion I don’t it’s no big deal. 🙂 8 years of marriage and the sex just keeps getting better!
  • My husband is a great student of my body. He knows exactly what places need to be stimulated for me to climax.
  • During intercourse with my spouse as we have sex I masturbate also. I can have 4 to 10 orgasms during 1 time of sex with my husband. And once or twice in a year I masturbate alone and I can have 4 to 15 orgasms.
  • More Lord.
  • My husband tries hard to make it happen during intercourse/sex/oral… But it really only happens when I do it myself. He’s super involved and WANTS to do it for me, and we’ve gotten close many times! But actual climax happens when I “do it.”
  • Love my rabbit vibrator.
  • This is a difficult subject for me. Since having children in the past 3 years. How I climax has drastically changed. I am still trying to figure out whether what we doing and what it takes is glorifying to God and respectful to my husband.
  • I have always found it frustrating that I can’t climax during sex without manual stimulation. I want to experience that with my husband. But he always makes sure that I am satisfied somehow 🙂
  • I needed a 1% option, ha. My husband finally gave me an orgasm during oral (after 9 years of marriage–mostly because of my hang ups about it), but it only worked once. All others in the past 6 months have been during sex for me. I can orgasm other ways, but unless they are during sex, they are shallow, weak, and somewhat unsatisfying, so I choose to only finish during sex. (Only works when I’m on top, probably about 80% of the time depending on life and my hormones.)
  • My percentages equalled up to 110% because the extra ways I orgasm, beyond intercourse, don’t come close to 10% but that was the lowest option.
  • When and how often I climax changed as I got older. When I was younger, it was so easy. I would climax in my dreams, while I slept…no kidding. I would even wake up as I was having an orgasm. It was awesome. I could climax on top. I could even FE. I didn’t know what it was at the time but it felt great. That was then, this is now. Now I’m in my 50’s and it’s kind of a struggle to get there. I don’t often want to climax. It’s not worth the struggle. I still enjoy sex tremendously but now I need a vibe to make it happen. Now it’s NOT about the ending but about the journey. I’m still enjoying the journey.
  • I love sex!
  • I live to orgasm. My husband loves to help me get there and often plays with me until I climax. We often watch one anther orgasm what a turn on.
  • Since I have become older (58) it takes a bit longer to get there and a bit more work. Love the extra attention!
  • Husband stimulates my clit.
  • I am multiple orgasmic and orgasm 4-5 times on average every time hubby and I make love, so my number of orgasms is based on 4 orgasms 3-4 times a week.
  • Not sure if this survey applies to me, as I am multi-orgasmic and it doesn’t take much to make me orgasm.
  • Only once, unmarried, age17.
  • I never had any orgasms the first 19 years of marriage, so it is a welcome change to experience orgasms.
  • My spouse & I have rarely had sex due to depression.
  • I orgasm every time that my spouse and I have sex because he makes sure I do! ❤

Men’s Comments:

  • It may sound crazy, but I love stats so I track all of my sexual activity now and have done so since 2010. Since January 2010 I have climaxed 949 times, the breakdown is as follows. Solo masturbation counts for 57.85% (549 times), manual stimulation (her using her hand) counts for 34.14% (324 times), vaginal intercourse counts for 4.53% (43 times), oral stimulation (kissing or licking me to climax, never traditional oral sex) counts for 3.37% (32 times), and manual stimulation (her using her feet) counts for 0.11% (1 time). While I enjoy hand stimulation, I really would love to increase the oral stimulation and intercourse percentages. Solo masturbation is only as high as it is because the others are so low. In months when we’re more sexually active, that percentage drops greatly. On average, I climax around 14 times a month and my drive has not changed over the past few years. My wife does not have near the level of drive that I do, but always seems to enjoy our activities when she’s in the mood.
  • Sex with my love has become awesome.
  • There have been a few times when one or both of us have become tired (or sore in her case) and the mood has “spoiled” before I orgasm, but that is rare. Any other time we have some form of sex without me orgasming, is when it is intentionally just for her, usually through manual or oral stimulation.
  • We’ve been married over 25 years. During the entire marriage I’ve solo masturbated almost daily if we haven’t had sex. When our kids were younger along with job pressures and travel, sex may only occurred 1-2 times/month with occasionally longer lapses. Over the last 3 months I have dedicated myself on re-establishing a right Christian relationship with my wife. I have almost eliminated all solo masturbation and focused my attention completely on her. We have become more intimate emotionally, spiritually and physically with sex at least 2 times per week where with both climax. I would like more but she feels 1 – 2x is all that’s need to satisfy her. We do cuddle every night and passionately kiss almost daily. Our attitudes toward pleasing each other is growing. I would say this is the best sex and closeness we’ve had in our entire marriage – I wish those years in our 20’s and 30’s weren’t so wasted. I hope and feel that with continued openness of conversation we’re establishing, we will increase frequency of satisfying my desires 3-4 times per week through either sexual intercourse or her pleasuring me through our cuddling.
  • Intercourse, Oral sex.
  • My wife has health issues so I go it alone a lot.
  • I don’t always have great orgasms because I’m holding back for my wife.
  • I rounded those percentages which is why they equal more than 100%.
  • Intercourse is very limited due to health issues. My wife and I do have “sex” in other ways 3-4 times a week with both of us reaching climax… her sometimes more than once. We feel it is very important to remain connected sexually even though intercourse (PIV) is very difficult. We use toys and manual/oral stimulation. We are in our late 50’s.
  • The “10%” answers were actually about 3% each but the options didn’t allow for that level of granularity.
  • Miserable sex life with my spouse….. Would have never ever married her had I know it would be this bad….. This is one time knowing before you get married would have been good.
  • There is nothing so satisfying as sex and orgasm with spouse, although we rarely orgasm at the same time.
  • My woman she never climax
  • I have recently abstained from solo masturbation, so these numbers are from before I quit. I used to masturbate very regularly, usually with porn. Sexlessness in our marriage lately contributed to this. It had progressed to the point of addiction. That’s not the right word… compulsion, maybe. Anyway, the Holy Spirit would not allow me to continue down that path, and I quit cold turkey. Our marital intimacy has not improved, however, and I have been consistently tempted to falter. When I absolutely must masturbate, I try to only think of my wife. Somehow it still feels wrong, though…
  • I miss the intimacy and foreplay as wife not interested
  • Would prefer Intercourse or oral sex to be a total of 100%, but we only have sex 2 or 3 times a month.
  • Gave up porn in the last year and really focusing on orgasm only with spouse present. Not yet perfect, but improving. Quality of orgasm & emotional part of it way more intense for both of us. Getting older though & physically changes are setting in (not as easily aroused, shorter orgasms, some less intensity/powerful ejacs, etc.). Working to gain some of that back. Would like more variety in methods of attaining (ie oral, manual, toys), too.
  • Would prefer to have a very different answers but wife has very low sex drive and not much interest in any form of sex more than about twice a month. Have high masturbation percentage because of this.
  • I’m military and have been gone 8 months out of the year, that is why so much solo masturbation.
  • OS once in 6 months is more than 0, but not anywhere near 10%.
  • We have developed an awesome idea of one day sexual touch day the next is nonsexual touch day. It’s not spontaneous but it allows my wife to put sex on the list of things that are going to happen that day. It gets her mind right for it. Also, on the other day, I am able to touch her whole body in a “back rub” fashion and she can relax and enjoy it knowing it is only that. No escalations..
  • My wife is pregnant with our third, and our other kids are 5 and under. A previous survey talked about times of day for good sex, and afternoons are best for us. We have about one afternoon a week together, and intercourse has only gotten more difficult as the pregnancy has progressed. She’s still super randy, though, so we frequently masturbate at the same time together, and we touch each other and do hot talk and fantasy talk to help each other out. It’s really fun for us, but we’d both love to get back to more energetic and involved sex once or twice per day. We’re both confident we will after the kids grow up a bit more.
  • I live in a sexless marriage.
  • Sex every 2-3 days on average with climax via intercourse. Hand, breast, or oral many days in between. Masturbation on a lot of the “off” days if I feel like I need it to sleep better or if my wife is sick or too tired (shed be willing but I feel bad asking her in those situations). Only go one or two days in a row without an orgasm of some type unless I’m very sick.
  • I think Oral would be fun about 10% of the time, but I’ll take what’s available.
  • Married almost 50 years – we’re still good!
  • My wife, on the other hand, has found it increasingly difficult to orgasm, which frustrates me greatly. She’d just as soon do without sex. Her body has changed the rules for whatever reason (menopause?). In her mind sex toys are out of the question, so I’m stuck.
  • I have never experienced orgasm from oral sex. Orgasms are very rare although I usually ejaculate.
  • Due to medical issues and medication I’m on – the side effects make it difficult to orgasm. When I do orgasm it’s usually not as strong before I was on the medication. My wife feels that she’s not able to please me and feels bad when it isn’t her fault. We discuss this regularly as it’s always present anytime we have sex. I’ve had plenty of time to reflect on this issue. Now, rather than focus on how powerful the orgasm was I’m just happy to have had sex with my wife. I focus more on enjoying the sights, sounds, feelings, etc. If I do orgasm I’m happy to have orgasmed. For me this has made a difference in my enjoyment and pleasure.
  • My stated number of climax is high mostly due to figuring out to dry climax (tantric?). It allows for greater frequency with loss of desire for wife.
  • I used solo masturbation as a way to keep my desires in check. I fantasize about my wife, keep it all in line and good. we make love once a week so it helps me to fight my previous porn addiction.
  • Wish 100 percent was with wife but she doesn’t want sex more than once or twice a month.
  • Vast majority of orgasms come with wife. Sometimes things don’t work out and I have to give myself some relief – to make it to next time with her!
  • I now try to masturbate with my wife present, if we don’t have sex, to have more control over what I think about. More often than not she helps me orgasm.
  • The orgasm percentage was higher than 100% because I orgasm multiple times during sex. I can orgasm while giving wife oral and I’m receiving zero stimulation.
  • Would love to have more oral sex, but my wife is reluctant.
  • I love being able to climax during intercourse. I had a vasectomy 2 years ago and it has made it so much easier to climax during intercourse without being worried about pregnancy or anything else. I am able to climax around 90% of the time during the intercourse. The times when I am not able to climax are when my wife finishes first and she helps me manually or visually stimulates me so I can finish.
  • Wife left me so I don’t have much choice.
  • I masturbate all too often.. But we have sex only once a month and it just gets to be too much.
  • I would like to orgasm in other ways with my spouse, e.g., anal sex, but I don’t know how to ask. This could be both giving and receiving (i.e., pegging).